As usual, some terrible "advice" being shared here. I was read an article last weekend about how women can lose their libido if the relationship is too good. It's a long read, but it might interest you. It's certain to be a better use of your time than this board.
http://www.nytimes.com/2009/01/25/magazine/25desire-t.html?_r=1&ref=magazine
You sir are incorrect. If my relationship is going good why on earth would I lose my libido?? If my husband is pulling all the right moves I want to have sex as much as possible!
You are in your 20s and have been together for years? First of all, you are both two young for a serious relationship.
If she loved you so much, she'd be having sex with you.
Who are you his father? There is no 'age' limit on being in a serious relationship. Yes if you are in the 2nd grade and you consider pulling hair and name calling a relationship you might be right, but being in your 20's and in a serious relationship is totally common.
I agree with part two, being a woman I can tell you that if she loved you she would either a.) have sex with you, b.) explain to you the reason she ISN'T having sex with you (ie:my period, im angry with you, I have crabs.. you get the point) or c.) she would help you get release in another way that doesn't involve actual intercourse ie:oral sex. If she isn't or hasn't done any of those things you really need to think long and hard about whats going on.
She's been on the OCP for several years now, and if you google, scientists suggest that i may reduce libido. theres not hard numbers though.
Yes the pill can lower libido for some women, you said she had been on it for years and if it were going to lower her libido it would have done so within the first 6 months, not all of a sudden.
i'm not a bad person, i'm the perfect boyfreind really. i do lots for her, keep her happy, enteratined. we both love each other very much, and still in love with each other.
My gf told her that she's exactly the same, and they both agree its just normal.
Oh please! the perfect boyfriend?? are you kidding me? Seriously get over yourself, thats step one to getting more sex. Unless you look like Johnny Depp, cook like Emeril Lagasse, make bank like Donald Trump, sing like John Mayer, write romance novels like Nicholas Sparks and fuck like Tommy Lee then you are
NOT the perfect boyfriend.
Also, if your girl friend & her friends are saying that not having sex is normal, their lying to you. It's normal for sex to not be an every day occurrence because obviously life gets in the way, sometimes we start our day at 5 am and don't get done with dinner and cleaning until 11 pm and at that point yeah its okay to say no to sex but if your just chillen and have the time and you are capable to have sex and your not? then no its not normal.
Wife or not. if you have sex before marriage don't lead someone on and don't think just because you are married you can with hold sex from your spouse.
Yep Will E got it, sex should never be used as a form of punishment, thats just petty and ridiculous. People who are having sex and are in a serious relationship should be old enough to have adult conversations and work out whatever their problems are rather then resorting to withholding sex.
I'm in a similar situation myself. We went from fucking twice a day to nothing but once a month or 2. Its to the point now I don't even bother to bring it up. I got fed up trying to get her in the mood and just leave it alone now. Internet porn is the only thing that keeps my loyal at this point.
I'm glad you aren't straying, you should read what I wrote above, and what I'm about to write below.
If your g/f or wife is having less sex with you these are the possible reasons why.
1.)She is extremely stressed with home or work life and is possibly depressed.
Cure-Take her out, wine & dine her make her feel happy and special again, remind her how much you love her and give her a massage!
2.) She has something going on 'down there' that she feels weird about.
Cure-If this is a new thing and she just recently stopped wanting sex, it could be gynecological. She could have a UTI or yeast infection, if thats the case she'll probably be better in about 2-4 weeks so just browse freeones and wait it out!
3.) She is trying to use sex as a punishment.
Cure-Think about anything and everything you have EVER done, (thats right EVER because some women will hold on to something you did last year and make you pay for it at the most random time because well, we are crazy) If you can remember something she might be mad at you for, see step one and add in a whole bunch of compliments and I love you's.
4.)This reason should only be assumed once the previous 3 are ruled out!
Possible reason 4.) She is trying to push you away emotionally by pushing you away physically.
Cure- At this point the best cure is to break it off. If she is using sex as a way to distance herself from you she is already moving on and you should to. If she isn't already sleeping with someone else it's only a matter of time until she is. Do yourself a favor and let go before you get hurt even more.
