Tips and advice on how to survive prison?!

[RedRaine]

Is there a book or blog on this? Any advice would be greatly appreciated ...

and yeah I know "Don't go to prison" is always rule # 1 along with "Don't get caught"

 

[gunslingingbird]

Don't drop the soap in the shower! :eek:

 

[Hot Mega]

Mind your own business and don't take anything offered to you no matter how generous the offer sounds.

If a guy gives you a candy bar for example.....if you eat it don't be surprised if he wants one back....not any one...the one he gave you.:2 cents:

 

[JiDoKwan]

Make sure if you have to play ball in prison that you're a pitcher and not the catcher.

 

[sexarise! chick]

Very curious...why are you asking about tips on how to survive in prison?

 

[Baill Inneraora]

Make sure if you have to play ball in prison that you're a pitcher and not the catcher.

Unless he is a big guy, I don't think will have much say in the matter.

 

[skechers]

You know the old saying. That first day, either kick somebody's ass or become someoness bitch.

After that you should be fine.

 

[STDiva]

lolwut

 

[Neutron66]

Find the biggest guy in the cell block and punch him in the face.

Seriously.

 

[BlueBalls]

Drop the soap on as many occasions as possible.

:nanner::nannerf1::nanner:

 

[BlueBalls]

Fucking double post, motherfucking, cunting, ass, boob, pee-pee, bum, bum!!!

 

[Ace Bandage]

Remember what Lawrence said in Office Space: "Peter... watch out for your cornhole, bud."

 

[mrtrebus]

Prison advice 1
What to do on your first day in the lunch queue
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=aF7i4-V1zq4&feature=related

 

[ChefChiTown]

Step 1: Just accept that you are going to be getting butt fucked
Step 2: Learn to enjoy it
Step 3: Send me letters, describing how it feels to have a man inside of you
Step 4: HAHAHAHAHAHA

 

[mrtrebus]

Prison Advice 2
Enjoy a varied diet!
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Ct3CcR3c4oM

 

[thebear247]

go up to the biggest guy in prison and kick his ass and show you wont take shit from anyone. oh you you said survive not die.
just stay out of trouble and keep your nose clean and your dick and make sure not to turn your back or bend over

 

[mongo18]

Find someone who can get you a rock hammer and a poster.

 

[gunslingingbird]

Find someone who can get you a rock hammer and a poster.

I see someone's watched Shawshank Redemption... :thumbsup:

 

[habo9]

Give good head :rofl:

 

[mrtrebus]

Prison Advice 3
Learn to dance
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=hMnk7lh9M3o&feature=related