Tips and advice on how to survive prison?!

[24788]

Well if your gay. Your in luck prison is easy for gays. If your not well have fun.

 

[mrtrebus]

Well if your gay. Your in luck prison is easy for gays. If your not well have fun.

 

[Ray Ecks]

Mind your own business.

 

[BlueBalls]

Well if your gay. Your in luck prison is easy for gays. If your not well have fun.

Ha! That's hilarious.

Please tell me there's at least some irony in that statement?

 

[darkwarrior3007]

On your first day and every week after that walk up to a prison guard and proceed to beat the shit out of him/her. This way you end up in solitary every week.

 

[Mr. Daystar]

Mind your own business and don't take anything offered to you no matter how generous the offer sounds.

If a guy gives you a candy bar for example.....if you eat it don't be surprised if he wants one back....not any one...the one he gave you.:2 cents:

And, don't give anyone any shit, and don't take it. If someone fucks with you, pummel them. If someone starts taking about sex, pummel them. If someone tries to tell you they have any rights, or hold any rules over you, pummel them. Good luck.

 

[MarineOne]

Step 1: Just accept that you are going to be getting butt fucked
Step 2: Learn to enjoy it
Step 3: Send me letters, describing how it feels to have a man inside of you
Step 4: HAHAHAHAHAHA

oh man, thats fucked up.

 

[gunslingingbird]

Just to clarify, you're going to prison, not jail, correct?

 

[mrtrebus]

Prison Advice 4
Act 'bad' & take no shit!
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=MbEVhaOWJnA

 

[PornKhaos]

lick the balls they love it.

 

[Rey C.]

You guys gotta get me out of here! There's this guy, Nasty Nate, who wants my fruit cocktail, and everyone here likes fresh fish! Then The Squirrel Master came out of left field and told me I'm his bitch!

 

[JakeSnake]

Don't drop the soap in the shower! :eek:

Beat me to it!

 

[D-rock]

Step 4: HAHAHAHAHAHA

Is that supposed to be him laughing or you laughing when you hear it?

 

[7777]

what we got here.... is a failure to communicate!!

 

[Hypergalaxy]

Mind your own business.

Best advice you are going to get. Just keep your head down and serve your time. That and pray you get a decent cell mate

 

[mastagambit]

Try to please everyone. Trying to act tough will get you fucked,and fucked up.

 

[BDwestcoast]

Learn to keester stash.
I saw a documentary where a guy keesterd a knife. It was seriously horrible to hear about what he had to go through to get it out.

 

[Wainkerr99]

Avoid eye contact.

 

[Supafly]

Think about two things:

You have to get a higher rank in prison. The lower the rank, the more shitty your life is going to be. This isn't only about sex in the showers, this is about all of the little deals that go on a the prices you have to pay. For the top hinchos in prison, more stuff is available at reasonabler prices.

Don't try to get friendly with the wardens. Inmates hate guys that are potential stool pigeons.

You may not have to beat people up, you can stay to yourself. Be careful who you befriend.