What's my problem...

[grower_boy]

Watch Risky Business this weekend. That'll set ya right up!

What's that, a TV show?

I've never had to approach chicks, they've always approached me. I hope I don't sound too pompous, I'm just telling it how it is.

Well she did approach me first, lol. Do chicks continue to approach you time and time again...you don't have to do any work at all?

I have met girls like that before. Cute but not over kill to where you would tense up around them. Mostly they are very very personable so you are instantly relaxed and think girl friend wife material. The unfortunate part is they are like that around most guys. The ball is in her court and she knows it.

LOL, that's describing things in a pretty interesting way. :1orglaugh

 

[TheOrangeCat]

What's that, a TV show?

I may have to kill you for your own good

NO. It's a movie. A classic. It's about getting the girl - while running a whorehouse in your parents' home while they are on vacation.

*EDIT* Don't even suggest piracy on Freeones.

 

[sayvara]

Nothing wrong with you... you're just about as shy as... oh, about... 75% of the normal poplation, guys and girls together.

Icebreakers... that's the hard part. Finding that connection that gives you something to talk about.

I'll give you another cliché... but it's a good one and it goes for everything in life: it it's to be, it's up to me. If you want something to happen, in most cases you vastly increase the chances of it if you act. Just sitting around waiting for it to happen will not make things happen.

Best of luck... and let me finish with a funny little story:
http://notalwaysright.com/love-a-jedi-shall-know/9507

Love A Jedi Shall Know
Grocery Store | Austin, TX, USA

(I was at work and I saw two girls from my college I knew as acquaintances, but not as much more than that. I had a crush on one of them as she was really pretty and seemed nice for the most part. I watched as she and her friend approached the register.)

My Crush: “No, you’re wrong! I’m telling you, he never said that!”

(I assumed they were gossiping about something until I listened a little more to the conversation.)

Her Friend: “No, he did! He totally did! We watched it last night, stupid!”

My Crush: “Obi-Wan never says, ‘I love you, Anakin’. The line is ‘You were my brother, Anakin. I loved you!’.”

Her Friend: “No!”

My Crush: *turns to me* “Oh hey [my name]! What’s up?”

Me: “Not much. I’m good. And you’re right; Obi-Wan’s line was ‘You were my brother, Anakin. I loved you’.”

My Crush: “Oh, my God, thank you!” *turns to her friend* “And you call yourself a Star Wars fan.”

(Her friend scowled, but they paid and said goodbye. I watched as they got to the automatic doors. Her friend pretended to use ‘The Force’ on them. Suddenly, my crush jumped in front of her.)

My Crush: “YOU SHALL NOT PASS!”

(I walked over and asked her out. We got married a month ago.)

/S

 

[georges]

You need to be your ownself, don't try be or act like someone else. just my two and very modest :2 cents:

 

[Arden Adamz]

I would highly recommend you play it cool... Girls really do love some mystery and finding a new guy is best when you get to have a little chase. Don't make yourself overly accessible, just be casual about it. She opened the door to some future communication-- so don't worry about that. I think you'll be surprised with what a little space can do! Good Luck!! xoxo

 

[HE1FiNEARTiST]

you call him a dweeb? but in retrospect your a dweeb as well. the first time you talked to her, you should have ended with, "i gotta run, but could you give me your number, perhaps we can finish this conversation over the phone" glad you stayed when she talked to the other guy, you should always listen and get leverage on him. dont worry about losing her, you still have a chance to ask her out. besides dont move to fast, just because a girl talked to you or smiled doesnt mean shes into you. when first meeting a guy, all girls think of them has friends.... unless you got the looks of a really hot guy. and remember, a girl is gonna know if she would fuck you or not within the first 5 minutes of talking. which i think you blew. but do not fret, young squire, you still have a chance. the next conversation you need to come off strong. trust me, ask for her number and do not seem to eager to wanna be with her, just play it cool. dont be money!!

 

[Straight Shooter]

Well she did approach me first, lol. Do chicks continue to approach you time and time again...you don't have to do any work at all?

A majority of the time the chicks approach me. It works out great for me because I don't have to do alot of thinking about how I'm going to approach a certain girl, what I'm going to say to her, etc.

Also the problem with you is that you are thinking too much. When you see her don't think about what you're going to do or say, just react. If you want to approach her and talk to her do it and don't think about it.

 

[Hot Mega]

Worst case, she's just a chatty girl who has many engaging but insignificant conversations everyday and you overplayed one of them.

Do something creative to get her attention....ideally something which catches her off-guard but within normal parameters of what a woman would think is 'cute' (not butting in her conversations with other people. That was a bad move...ESPECIALLY if she was babbling with some other swinging dick. Her response was predictable.).

You're looking for an affirmative (yes) or at least an affirmative indecision (maybe) from your move. So put her in a position from your action to know your intentions while also leaving her options open. You do that by creating the illusion of broadening the conversation. Convey to her what you romantically plan, hope or would like to do for or with her someday. You're more likely to get her to consider 'maybe' along with yes or no.

One caveat, this is Valentine's time of year. That could have very good implications or very bad implications for your prospects with her in the near term.

 

[PirateKing]

Eliminate the competition. :2 cents:

 

[luvingirls]

I hate to say this...but you need to be more of a prick. You sound too nice. Seriously, she talking to the messed up hair dude who's swearing because....well, he's a prick. He's showing more confidence in himself than you. Become a little bit more mysterious to her. Start talking to some other girls....let her notice that. Walk by her and throw up a "what's up?" without stopping to talk to her. Then at the right time, start talking to her a little more. Then tell her your going to a bar or club to check out a band on Friday and ask her if she wants to go check them out with you.

 

[grower_boy]

I may have to kill you for your own good

NO. It's a movie. A classic. It's about getting the girl - while running a whorehouse in your parents' home while they are on vacation.

Got isohunt? Got UT orrent?

I order you to rip and watch.

My internet is way too slow for that, but I'll watch it when I can. :1orglaugh

Nothing wrong with you... you're just about as shy as... oh, about... 75% of the normal poplation, guys and girls together.

Icebreakers... that's the hard part. Finding that connection that gives you something to talk about.

I'll give you another cliché... but it's a good one and it goes for everything in life: it it's to be, it's up to me. If you want something to happen, in most cases you vastly increase the chances of it if you act. Just sitting around waiting for it to happen will not make things happen.

When did I say I was I shy? :dunno:

You need to be your ownself, don't try be or act like someone else. just my two and very modest :2 cents:

Thanks.

I would highly recommend you play it cool... Girls really do love some mystery and finding a new guy is best when you get to have a little chase. Don't make yourself overly accessible, just be casual about it. She opened the door to some future communication-- so don't worry about that. I think you'll be surprised with what a little space can do! Good Luck!! xoxo

Thanks for the advice, I appreciate it! It's great to get advice from a woman on this topic. I'll definitely try to be more casual about things.

you call him a dweeb? but in retrospect your a dweeb as well. the first time you talked to her, you should have ended with, "i gotta run, but could you give me your number, perhaps we can finish this conversation over the phone" glad you stayed when she talked to the other guy, you should always listen and get leverage on him. dont worry about losing her, you still have a chance to ask her out. besides dont move to fast, just because a girl talked to you or smiled doesnt mean shes into you. when first meeting a guy, all girls think of them has friends.... unless you got the looks of a really hot guy. and remember, a girl is gonna know if she would fuck you or not within the first 5 minutes of talking. which i think you blew. but do not fret, young squire, you still have a chance. the next conversation you need to come off strong. trust me, ask for her number and do not seem to eager to wanna be with her, just play it cool. dont be money!!

The first 5 minutes of talking were awesome on the first day. It was the second day when they sucked. :1orglaugh

Worst case, she's just a chatty girl who has many engaging but insignificant conversations everyday and you overplayed one of them.

Do something creative to get her attention....ideally something which catches her off-guard but within normal parameters of what a woman would think is 'cute' (not butting in her conversations with other people. That was a bad move...ESPECIALLY if she was babbling with some other swinging dick. Her response was predictable.).

You're looking for an affirmative (yes) or at least an affirmative indecision (maybe) from your move. So put her in a position from your action to know your intentions while also leaving her options open. You do that by creating the illusion of broadening the conversation. Convey to her what you romantically plan, hope or would like to do for or with her someday. You're more likely to get her to consider 'maybe' along with yes or no.

One caveat, this is Valentine's time of year. That could have very good implications or very bad implications for your prospects with her in the near term.

Yeah, I realize that. It's kind of bad timing to be honest, but I don't care.

Eliminate the competition. :2 cents:

Let me get my sledgehammer.

I hate to say this...but you need to be more of a prick. You sound too nice. Seriously, she talking to the messed up hair dude who's swearing because....well, he's a prick. He's showing more confidence in himself than you. Become a little bit more mysterious to her. Start talking to some other girls....let her notice that. Walk by her and throw up a "what's up?" without stopping to talk to her. Then at the right time, start talking to her a little more. Then tell her your going to a bar or club to check out a band on Friday and ask her if she wants to go check them out with you.

LOL, this is one of the most interesting posts. I'll definitely do the talking to other girls thing. Like I said there is a hotter girl that usually sits on the other side of me and I know her from high school. So girls really do go for the pricks?

 

[TheOrangeCat]

My internet is way too slow for that, but I'll watch it when I can. :1orglaugh

Yea, your local video store should have it. It's worth it. Tom Cruise aside (although he is awesome and this is well before he went insane) you get to see Rebecca de Mornay getting fucked six ways from Sunday, and it contains one of the great movie lines of all time.

Joel: So is this Guido guy... he's your "manager"?
Lana: That's right.
Joel: Or a pimp?
Lana: Now that's quick Joel. Have you always been this quick, or is this something new?
Miles: I don't believe this! I've got a trig midterm tomorrow, and I'm being chased by Guido the killer pimp.

 

[Deepcover]

Yea, your local video store should have it. It's worth it. Tom Cruise aside (although he is awesome and this is well before he went insane) you get to see Rebecca De Mornay getting fucked six ways from Sunday, and it contains one of the great movie lines of all time.

Joel: So is this Guido guy... he's your "manager"?
Lana: That's right.
Joel: Or a pimp?
Lana: Now that's quick Joel. Have you always been this quick, or is this something new?
Miles: I don't believe this! I've got a trig midterm tomorrow, and I'm being chased by Guido the killer pimp.

Hmmmmm...Rebecca De Mornay getting fucked six ways from Sunday, that I have to check out.

 

[grower_boy]

So I hate to be a wimp and bump this thread, but I kinda have to.

I took in the advice you guys gave me a couple weeks back. I backed off of her a bit, and it worked pretty good. That first week after the advice we didn't really talk much but it was what it was. On Monday, we finally had a good conversation again. Only, she walked away and came back in the middle of it, which was odd. Then in class she sits between me and that other guy, and she partnered with me rather than him, which was cool. But after class she left really fast...I couldn't figure out why.

Today I passed by her on campus and didn't really say hi to her. I didn't ignore her - we noticed each other but for some reason never said hi. I came to class later than usual, and she was talking with that guy again. Only she seemed really happy to see me. Like a dumbass, I don't think I looked too happy to see her. I was pretty nervous. She made some comment about how I was there "in the nick of time" which was pretty funny. IDK why, but I didn't really reply. We were looking at each other a lot and she left all fast again.


It won't get off my mind. I feel like a total asshole now, and I don't have that class till next week. I swear, I take one step forward and two steps back.

 

[Ulysses31]

So I hate to be a wimp and bump this thread, but I kinda have to.

I took in the advice you guys gave me a couple weeks back. I backed off of her a bit, and it worked pretty good. That first week after the advice we didn't really talk much but it was what it was. On Monday, we finally had a good conversation again. Only, she walked away and came back in the middle of it, which was odd. Then in class she sits between me and that other guy, and she partnered with me rather than him, which was cool. But after class she left really fast...I couldn't figure out why.

Today I passed by her on campus and didn't really say hi to her. I didn't ignore her - we noticed each other but for some reason never said hi. I came to class later than usual, and she was talking with that guy again. Only she seemed really happy to see me. Like a dumbass, I don't think I looked too happy to see her. I was pretty nervous. She made some comment about how I was there "in the nick of time" which was pretty funny. IDK why, but I didn't really reply. We were looking at each other a lot and she left all fast again.


It won't get off my mind. I feel like a total asshole now, and I don't have that class till next week. I swear, I take one step forward and two steps back.

You're beginning to sound like an asshole too but that can't be helped. Seeing as you're in the same class together you should be doing some group work pretty soon so get her number (if you already haven't) on the premise that you may need to discuss work, then you begin texting on a regualr basis (not too often or anything perverse) so you stay in her head and maybe discover some of her interests in her replies. Start talking to that other asshole but don't mention her and see if he brings her up, you may get some info out of him. There may even be the chance that she actually likes you (eventhough you're an asshole) which explains her indifference towards you, maybe she's nervous. Although there is also the possibility that she has a boyfriend off campus so she has to get away ASAP after class, hot woman tend to have some brutal thug lurking in the background due to a combination of him harassing them and her stringing him along as 'backup'. ps How did she walk away from you at the beginning of a conversation and return in the middle, did you carry on talking after she left?

 

[grower_boy]

You're beginning to sound like an asshole too but that can't be helped. Seeing as you're in the same class together you should be doing some group work pretty soon so get her number (if you already haven't) on the premise that you may need to discuss work, then you begin texting on a regualr basis (not too often or anything perverse) so you stay in her head and maybe discover some of her interests in her replies. Start talking to that other asshole but don't mention her and see if he brings her up, you may get some info out of him. There may even be the chance that she actually likes you (eventhough you're an asshole) which explains her indifference towards you, maybe she's nervous. Although there is also the possibility that she has a boyfriend off campus so she has to get away ASAP after class, hot woman tend to have some brutal thug lurking in the background due to a combination of him harassing them and her stringing him along as 'backup'. ps How did she walk away from you at the beginning of a conversation and return in the middle, did you carry on talking after she left?

Yeah, I hope that it comes up soon. The thing that sucks is that we only have this class twice per week. Why exactly do I sound like an asshole now? Because I ignored her?

She could have a boyfriend off-campus..but she could also be a lesbian or a serial killer, you know what I mean? She seems kinda nervous when she's around me, probably from when we first met and she could tell I was "all over her". She just needs her space, I guess. I guess she just doesn't want me chatting her up after class, when that other guy isn't around.

As for the P.S., we got done talking about something and she just randomly bolted to the bathroom, and came right back.

 

[Ulysses31]

Yeah, I hope that it comes up soon. The thing that sucks is that we only have this class twice per week. Why exactly do I sound like an asshole now? Because I ignored her?

She could have a boyfriend off-campus..but she could also be a lesbian or a serial killer, you know what I mean? She seems kinda nervous when she's around me, probably from when we first met and she could tell I was "all over her". She just needs her space, I guess. I guess she just doesn't want me chatting her up after class, when that other guy isn't around.

As for the P.S., we got done talking about something and she just randomly bolted to the bathroom, and came right back.

Just meant you sound like an asshole to me not her hmmm Lesbian serial killer. She could have some medical condition she's embarassed about, anything from anorexia/bulimia to IBS, not uncommon in young women. There is also the possiblity she doesn't want a boyfriend, I tend to feel women get nowhere near as obsessive as us men do when we see someone we like. Best play it cool and wait on her signs and get to know that other mouthy jackass a bit better. Trust me I've been there obsessing about someone that's caught my eye and going over every detail with a fine tooth comb, what I'd give to be young again

 

[Hot Mega]

In reading some of this g/b...I think your (real) problem is you're not ready for anything more than a classroom crush with this girl.

Why bother yourself with who this girl is making small talk with if that's all you're doing with her?

Your crush on her aside are you honestly ready to be more than a guy she happens to chit-chat with on occasion?

It doesn't seem like it and definitely not if you're getting visibly bothered by the sight of her babbling with another guy...when it appears you're just another guy to her too.

Unless she has some definitive idea you're not striving to be just a friend...some of your reactions and games might appear to be creepy to her after awhile.

Maybe I'm reading more into this than is apparent and I don't know her personality. But I would say size up your situation in terms of whether you're really ready to have your 'bluff' called should she respond positively to a next step...then take the next step.

The worst she can say is she's not interested and in that case you're no worse of than you are now. But just have enough character and manhood to accept this if it comes to it and still be the same guy to her in class. For whatever it's worth she'll at least respect you more....and for your efforts you can move on one way or the other.

 

[Rey C.]

You've talked to her several times now, right? OK, now *casually* ask her if she'd like to grab some lunch one day. Assuming she goes, you can then continue talking to her (in private) and see if there's any point in pursuing her. But don't "pursue her"... I mean, don't go all ga-ga. Just be yourself. I'm assuming she's about your age (18-22)? So don't come off like you want to propose to her if she agrees to go out with you. If lunch is nice, then ask her to dinner and a movie at some point. Like several others have said, just be yourself and don't get (or appear to be) obsessive. Guy or girl, no one likes to have an obsessive person around them.

Good luck. Let us know if you ask her out to lunch-> dinner/movie and what happens

 

[rayman53x]

^Good advise. Just play it cool bud. One thing I've learned about girls is when they like you, they like you (as long as you don't do anything weird to upset the balance lol) After that you talk to her when You feel its good for you (watch out for yourself) I hate to be somewhat of a downer but... you will not Marry this girl lol Sooo that should help take some of the pressure off. I don't know what you look like or how you talk, but when your in a conversation just be layed back and nice. and yeahh^ casually ask her to chill, maybe get her number (that always works for me) and see if she has a facebook or something. Their are a lot of other girls too. If she hurts you in a way emotionally, don't even think twice about (you two are just fine in her mind) and look for other girls. I mean it, Look for other girls because she looks for other guys. your in college, not high school. once you learn the language things start to work out better. It took me a year of college to finally understand that, and I'm saving you some time. Still go after her, but have some other girls to go after too. Even make some friend girls so they can hook you up like me (Its so much easier that way, you have no idea) lol

Thats the Best I can do for you through freeones lol It's a lot of writing but I hope you get something out of it. Life is good, and you should embrass it man. The rest is up to you!
Go get her